I´ve been meaning to write about this for a while so let´s get it out of the way right now. As you might remember, a couple weeks ago I wrote this angry/depressive/suicidal post, that day I just had a meltdown/breakdown (however they gringos say it I don´t remember) the day was awful, I spent the morning from my desk to the bathroom to cry, and in general I was sad and quiet and everybody noticed because at lunch everyone asked what was wrong with me, and I was like, nothing I´m fine, so the HR manager who knows me, asked me and I said that I was ok, later that day she called me to her office and asked again what was wrong, if it was something personal, if it was work and right then and there I started to cry and told her everything, about how bad I felt there, about how I didn´t think I was doing a good job... everything!! but I told her that I couldn´t just quit cuz I needed the money... she said that she understood me and asked me if I wanted her to start looking for a replacement for my position... she also told me to not worry for the money, that I was going to receive all my money as if they had me fired... I couldn´t be any happier than that or not happy but relieved more than anything, so that´s how folks since last tuesday I´m unemployed... I received all my money, paid all my debts and am more calm now, everybody at work was surprised by my leave but what can I say... I wasn´t happy there anymore.... it was nothing like what I tought in my head and in the end I felt really weird, didn´t imagine it was going to be so easy but, I understand that it was the best thing to do as I later learned that firing me wasn´t in my boss´s plans... at least for now.

I know that I have to use this free time to find myself, there´s a lot of stuff that´s not clear for me, I don´t know what to do with my life, where to go and I´m so old for that, I´m in an age where I was supposed to have some of my life goals completed, but then again I don´t know what I want for my life... I need to go somewhere, I´m really confused... I´m wasting lots of time, and time won´t come back... but I think this here is an oportunity erase everything and start anew and do things the right way... or at least a more convenient way.